Testing Day 7 – Testing Instructions

So every day I have to read the same instructions which start with “We are ready to begin the test” and then continue for three more pages. It’s literally basic instructions on how to fill in a multiple choice question. I have to ask them to check not only that their name is on their test books, but that the numbers printed on them haven’t magically changed overnight. Anyhow, this is dedicated to everyone who has to read or listen to the same instructions, day after day after day after day…

Testing Instructions

At this point now, students
We’re ready to start
No DON’T OPEN IT YET
We’re not quite at that part

Today we’ll do Part 9
It’s 12 different sections
I’ll explain them, but first
Do you have any questions?

Anyone? Anyone?
Then I’ll move on
Please open your test books
To page 31

Now look at the first box
Please quietly read it
I’ll also be reading
Out loud if you need it

It says: “You are ready
To start your test session
Step 1: Using a pencil”
Let’s pause — are there questions?

Anyone? Anyone?
Then I’ll read more
–Yes, I know that we’ve read
This all ten times before

You did not raise your hand
That’s a test violation
I warned what would happen
In this situation

Yes, Officer Palmer?
Your help is awaited
Our test code of conduct
Has been violated

Please drop your test book
In the shredder downstairs
You’ll have to start over
Your new book’s prepared

Apologies, class
Back to what is allowed
Read Box 2 to yourself
While I read it out loud…

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