You’re buying a pet? That’s no trouble at all!
I can sell you a BIG pet or one that is small.
I can sell you a pet with sharp spikes, fangs, and claws
Or one that can pick up your child with its paws
Here’s my personal favorite, it’s seven feet tall
It’ll happily grind coffee beans in its jaws
Or perhaps you’d like something more useful than that
Like a blue salamander you wear as a hat
Or this purple chipmunk that glows when it roars
It makes a good nightlight (but careful — it snores).
Or — what’s that? You say that you wanted a cat?
I’m sorry, it seems like you’ve got the wrong store.